1. |
Horizon
06:22
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Horizon
I’m tired
And into this night I slip
While blue branches
Break against the sky
The shadows pass
And the emptiness fills
While blue branches
Pull down the sky
And into this night
Of symbols I turn
And return to secrecy
A child’s summer legacy
And return to secrecy
To lay down the ghost
In me
And into this night
Of symbols I burn
And pushing past misery
I will ignite this memory
And pushing past misery
This foolish gray tragedy
There are birds that dot
The horizon
There are times
When I just can’t
Go on
There are moments
That empty all reason
With a season that
Dances towards ice
And into this night
Of symbols I turn
And return to secrecy
A child’s summer legacy
I will return to secrecy
To lay down the ghost
In me
And into this night
Of symbols I burn
And pushing past misery
I will ignite this memory
And pushing past misery
This foolish gray tragedy
(I will go, alarmed at these dreams
alive and blue black screams
To the world below – the shadows in the snow
These pictures that wind, and bind the roots
Of ashen barked time
We ascend –
Now in substance,
Now in distance
Two small black scars
Hidden wounds
In a sea of stars
This victory is fleeting
Its hands holding
Then retreating
Before this arch of terrors
Bends back
Holds sway
Or sweeps this all
Beyond the bleak day
Sun fades
And the morning bleeds out
Swollen around the foliage
And bent into trees
These sounds and souls
On breath and breeze
Aching for release
A consistent thread
Winds our paths – entwined
In day – in dread…)
And into this night
Where the shadows
Pull tight
And into this night
We shall go…
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2. |
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Into Nothing (black water song)
Sail on now, out into darkness
Oh my boys
How these black waters rise
Sail on, with a thousand
Goodbyes burning
Back across the shore line
And silently we’ll watch
The buildings tumble
Grey tattered steel
hung across the horizon
I keep my eyes far
From the city
Where the sad sun rises
Only to set
And who is this
Who walks beside us,
Cloaked in sorrow
And in tears?
His voice it whispers
In our ears
But when we listen
There is no one there
For us to hear
Sail on now, into black waters
Leave your dreaming for awhile
Sail on now into silence
Out into nothing
…I suppose
Sail on into darkness
Oh my love
How these black waters rise
Sail on now into the silence
That waits in turn
For the word to speak
Sail on
though hope shall not hold us
As the night comes on
I will wrap around you
All the light
That I can hold
All the light now
That I can bleed
Sail on now into nothing
Leave your harbor safe and warm
It’s tattered sails and cardboard ships
Only play host to the starving ghosts
And who is this who stands beside us
Known in emptiness and in blood
Sail on into nothing
Out into nothing
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3. |
fallen
07:00
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Fallen I am
Fallen am I
Like the snow on the ground
When the winter comes ‘round
Fallen I am
Fallen am I
Neither sign nor star
Has ever fallen so far
…has ever fallen so far…
For his love was immense
It was terrifying
And I could not exist
In the fullness of him
I thought it better to reign
And as rain I shall fall
I will wrap myself warm in my flesh
Safe at last from all that he’s blessed
And I shall soften the features
Of his face as he appears
Before his creatures
But I’ll spit on the broken
Crown of the human race
Fallen I am
Fallen am I
Like the snow on the ground
When the winter comes ‘round
Fallen I am
Fallen am I
Neither sign nor star
Has ever fallen so far
…has ever fallen so far…
But Michael, oh Michael
Oh you blond child…
You sing at his feet
Yet appear elevated by your very nature
Your back does not really bend
Nor hunchbacked do you appear
…though you kneel
But as for me
When I began to sing
The notes they choked in my throat
And the words just fell all apart
And the fire…
It just left my heart
Fallen I am
Fallen am I
Like the snow on the ground
When the winter comes ‘round
Fallen I am
Fallen am I
Neither sign nor star
Has ever fallen so far
…has ever fallen so far…
And there’s one house empty
Oh, there’s one house empty
There’s one house empty
In Jerusalem tonight
In Jerusalem tonight
Oh, there’s one house empty
There’s one house empty
Yes there’s one house empty
In Jerusalem tonight
In Jerusalem tonight
In Jerusalem good night
In Jerusalem
Turn out the light…
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4. |
for an autumn girl
04:42
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Leaves in your hair, and the bright morning air
It’s so…
Halo the sun, as the daybreak has come
It’s so…
This is the place
Where all that you feel…
All is for real,
All this is real…
Burn fast the shadows
Our past and its phantoms.
Your form echoes out –
A slight glimmer of blue.
And all that we’ve wanted
Waited and willed
Taken time from its haunting
Clear and distilled
About our bodies
(In colors swim…)
And this is the place
At the edge of your sleep
With hands extended
To gather, to keep.
And in the silence we fall as one,
To the sentient sky
And all has begun.
All has overcome.
“A drink to the death of endings…”
My heart and my eyes
Now become as birds
Ascending pen winged
to your sky
My heart and my eyes
No become as birds
Ascending open winged
To your sky…
And it’s all for an autumn girl…
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5. |
flowers under glass
06:08
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The killer took the hand of the small child
And pulled roses from her smile
“Is this how you keep your flowers?”
“Under glass, no beauty can endure…”
And we watched from a lonely starch white bed
And you put your hands to mine
“Can you still feel these holes?
…That my waken skin did bear”
You gave a small laugh and assured me
That you still held the nails …these nails
You gave a small laugh and assured me
That you still held these nails…these nails
And we walked through fields laden with crosses
For each brave soul there stands a cross
I am not a brave soul
But you built for me an alter anyway
With your skin of silk…
I do think of this often
Though my eyes grow dim with tears
And surely the end
However it shall be
Waits for pity…or amusement
For see my eyes this mockery
Any warmth you find in my embrace
For I am dead
And these shadows you promised
Would comfort me
Now drown me in their emptiness
Drown me in their emptiness
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6. |
your lily white hands
05:21
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Now its springtime again
And the sparrows descend
And your lily-white hands
Well they reach out to me
And your lily-white hands
They’re all that I see
They’re all that I see…
Now the people are talking
I hear them down in the street
They’re just holes in the emptiness
Our eyes never meet
And their laughing words
Are just sorrows deferred
And they don’t mean a thing to me
You are all that I see
You are all that I see…
Lift me up ~ lift me up
Drag me down~ drag me down
I don’t care where I go
If I’m carried by your lily-white hands
Carried by your lily-white hands
Carried by your lily-white hands
Carried by your lily-white hands
And I see you in forests
Moving free in the night
And seven white stars
About your face hover bright
And you are crowned as a lamb
That rises above the earth
And the hope of your body
Holds the hope of rebirth
And seven bright angels
They surround you in song
And you appear in the darkness
In many shapes
And in many shapes you belong
Lift me up~ lift me up
Drag me down~ drag me down
I don’t care where I go
If I’m carried by your lily-white hands
Carried by your lily-white hands
Carried by you lily-white hands
I’ll be buried by your lily-white hands…
Now its springtime again
And the sparrows descend
And your lily-white hands
They reach out to me
And your lily-white hands
well they’re all that I see
they’re all that I see….
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7. |
a season apart
08:17
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A premonition
A definition…
Life tearing away
From patchwork and muted gray
Stolen back, and given meaning…
A turn out of season…
A final escape
Past the confines of reason
A madness that refreshes
And brings in its wake
A new wilderness
An unmapped truth
And a summer of possibilities
Pain, and her abilities
To find fire in stone
To find fire in stone…
One together a multitude
But always all together
In being alone
And one together a multitude
But we’re all together
We’re all alone…
This solitude this stance against sky
Where the small storms pass
Where these gods come to die
And return to sky
To freedom and void
Where nothing is fallen
Enveloped or destroyed
Where nothing is fallen
And nothing is destroyed
And nothing is destroyed
And waking new Adam
From this dust and this clay
And burning the flesh
Until the spirit gives way
Until the spirit gives way
This rune carved in skin
Yet deeper within
This rune carved in skin
Yet deeper…
And hard through the night
The rain and its flight
Driven like tears
Like tears to the ground
Driven Like tears to the ground
And waiting in darkness
The spirits that haunt us
And waiting in darkness
They flocked madly around
They flocked madly around
Time arose from his throne
The passage behind had opened
Eternity embraced her home
And the features of his face
Reached out,
Then disappeared
A leering specter
Once false substance and menace
Now enveloped in distance
Reeling as he passed
Into the ground of dead ideals
Relinquishing the lines
The boxes and crimes
That hold life to definition
This limit and prison
That hold life to definition
Your limit is your prison
Void, night now smiled
The hunt will demand darkness
Stark, shadow and fear
The deepest black falls
When the light crawls near
This rune is carved in skin,
Yet deeper within
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8. |
blossoms
06:11
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We are garlands
Hung on the crown of death
Bursting ephemeral worlds
With the exit of our breath
We are the blossoms
Of no one
And the blossoming
Of nothing
We are bereft of garden
Or gardener
The blossoms nobody shelters
Housed in blood, in mud, and in glass
In the rib cage
Of the broken body
That houses this age
Between the silence
And the pounding waves
We are driftwood
And we are dreams
Born of longing
Born of death
Our fingers and senses
Torn and displayed
On the five-pointed
Wheel of the world
Bleeding out into endless
night
out into nothing
I suppose
We envy the flight
Of the birds
For whom god is not dead
And we envy the plight
Of the stars
For being too far
To think of divinity
At all…
Spirit
Inside of flesh
Flesh peering back
Into the lack
The pain of new birth
In your eyes heaven
In my hands the earth
Beyond the horizon
Of the ideal
Lies the wound
Of the real
Of the real…
We envy the flight of the birds
For whom god is not dead
We envy the plight of the stars
For being too far
To think of divinity
At all…
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9. |
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Lange musst du leiden, kennend nicht was,
bis plötzlich aus gehässig erbissener Frucht
deines Leidens Geschmack eintritt in dir.
Und da liebst du schon fast das Gekostete. Keiner
redet dirs wieder aus.
After this nothingness, after this passage
Through flesh and boundary.
After this wandering…
Abandoned landscapes
Barefoot marching,
Through a silence
Only god sees…
Through a violence
And a cessation
Of all sighs
And all summers.
A barren hearth
Where the roots
Twist inwards
Sink-and-dissipate.
Where dawn
Turns backwards
And flees into reversal
Words fall apart
Syllables dangle
From swollen veins,
Then empty
Like autumn
Like a house devoid of life
Like a house devoid of light
No dwelling
No life
No secret green
At the end of this night…
But then,
In a moment…
We stop
We stare
We turn
We fall prey…
“And where,
Where are the angels?
Strange dreams
In distant skies…”
“And where,
Where are the angels?
Shall they come swiftly
For you hand i…
For you and i?”
And how shall they
Receive us?
There hands like iron,
Held out to the sky…
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10. |
distance
06:29
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There’s a place that I know
Deep inside the pain of life
Where the shadows of our lights
Lie and wait for sacred night.
There’s a trembling in my hands
A sad and slow will to touch
The silence and the nullity
That echo deep within me.
So take my hands and hold
The confines of my soul,
So take my eyes to see…
For I can’t understand
No, I can’t understand…
There’s a path that twist before me
A hollow fragile road
And I can touch it’s longing
It’s far before I touch it’s promise
I can see the stars, dim, sterile, bright and far
As they echo out behind me,
In a slight October breeze…
So take my heart and feel
And take my limbs to walk
The way is waiting here
Amongst the symbols of our fear…
And I can’t understand,
No I can’t understand…
And the voice carries me
But I can’t understand…
And the silence swallows me
But I can’t understand…
And the sky opens me
But I can’t understand,
No I can’t understand…
So take my eyes to see
Take my ears to hear
Take my hands to touch,
For in the hollows of the heart
Reason is torn apart,
And I can’t understand
No I can’t understand…
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LUX INTERNA San Francisco, California
Apocalyptic Americana for apocalyptic times.
LUX INTERNA recommends:
Beautiful shafts of light refracted through the ominous haze of the anthropocene. Even in its bleakest moments, a fire runs through this album that makes you want to keep up the fight - come what may.
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